It started at 5:30 p.m. today when I suddenly felt motivated to shoot a self-portrait. I chose to take a picture in the room I grew up in. Even though I spent years in that bedroom, I hardly go in there anymore–except to make the occasional mess. I do, however, go in there and reflect. Cheerleading and athletic trophies as well as academic ribbons and certificates plaster the room, and it takes me back in time—sometimes to dream about good memories, and other times, not so much.
To prepare for this self-portrait, I hopped in the shower for a raw–almost drowned–look. I decided not to wear makeup for this shot and kept the clothing simple and white. I went online for inspiration and randomly bumped into images from The Grudge. I don’t know about you, but that movie scared the living daylights out of me. I far too easily suspend my disbelief and end up curled in a little ball whenever I watch scary movies. Fun times.
The TV newscaster announced a tornado watch that (thankfully) scooched me off the computer. I quickly set up a light with a blue gel over it. The air felt soggy and heavy, and mosquitoes bit my tender skin. I still do not have my cable remote, so I had to put it on the 10-second timer and run out every time to take a single shot. What a sight! My dog, Mia, cocked her head every time I whizzed by, and even though I intended to have a menacing expression, I ended up looking dignified, stoic and benevolent. Mia certainly lightened the mood, and I can appreciate the result.
Next, I set up a strip light and tried to give subtle illumination. As soon as the CF card filled up, I pulled the strobe indoors, and the sky dropped down sheets of rain. I looked through the images in Adobe Bridge and beat myself up pretty hard about the lighting. I should have gone the extra mile and put up at least two additional kicker lights; furthermore, a gridded strip light would have added more to the shot. Because of my laziness, I ended up spending way too much time in post fixing my mistakes. D’oh!
From start to finish, this photo took 12 hours to complete (preparation, set-up, shoot, post-production, random online b.s.’ing and blog). I need to hit the hay, so I need some pleasant thoughts in my head. Mia just looked up at me with that same grin from earlier today. Bingo.
Houston, Texas 2009
Gear: Canon 5D Mark II
Canon EF 24-70mm f/2.8 L USM Lens
Lighting: AB 1600 with strip light – main, AB 1600 with 30° grid and blue gel
© Amy Dunn
All rights reserved
18 Comments
i think the kicker lights would have ruined the mood. if your intent was to create credible lighting with a natural feel, you did it. sometimes less is more.
Great Shot … I didnt notice the apparition in the window at first and Yikes!
You look so sad on the bed .
awesome! I want a creepy picture! Your such an actress!
Glenn, that’s a very good point. I have photography crushes on people like Gregory Crewdson, David LaChapelle, and of course, YOU, so I always hold myself to those standards. You’re right, though–not every photograph dictates that kind of lighting.
You know what, Steven? I got your email about your interpretation of this photo (i.e. present Amy being disappointed in younger Amy). It’s interesting, based on our recent conversations, you may have more insight to what I was feeling in this photograph than anyone I know. It’s amazing how everyone has their own interpretation of this photograph, though, and I love it. Here is something a Flickr friend wrote:
“You are up during the night cause you can’t sleep. You have your stuffed animal for company and security. But your thoughts are troubling and you aren’t sure what to do or how to handle your situation. I gather this by your photo in the mirror with the vindictive expression on her face as if to be pronouncing you “GUILTY” and you feel you have been wrongly accused! And the aged look you placed on the photo means that these thoughts have troubled you for years.”
Before I reveal too many intimate details of this image, I want to hear more interpretations. Even though I did not intend any of the aforementioned theories, sometimes we communicate things in photos on a subconscious level.
I like it….definitely captured the creepy feel. (Sorry for my scary comment during!!) I also love the “grainy, aged look…it adds a lot. Interesting interpretations so far….amazing thing about art—how people can see so many different things looking at exactly the same thing.
Ahhhhh… your room. A virtual department store right inside the closet located just outside of this shot. LOL!!!
Oh boy. I know I need to look much longer as there is so much going on there.
Love it, let me say first!
I see longing, I see sadness, i see . . . distance, and I see some fear.
It is quite the Grude influenced theme, but I do not see scary creepy scary.
I see Real Life Scary, if you know what I mean?
And I agree about the lights. As one who learned lighting for stage before for still photo I know . . there are the rules and then there is getting the effect. and I think you got that right.
But (lol) trust me or not, I once mixed filtered colored light to get white in the middle of the hot spot with out even trying. I know that unintended can get some fun results!
Love your stuff!
LOL.
Very cool.
Well, everyone is touching on the spook factor of this this shot and while I can certainly see that, I’m getting a much more reflective, melancholy feel. You may feel as if you fell short on what you wanted to accomplish Amy, but it it’s still a good image.
It is spooky… but i Love it!!!
U’ve done a great job on this one…
Thank you for your support. I was unsure about this one, but it’s always nice to step out of your comfort zone as a photographer.
Slightly off topic, sorry. But I have finally had my first discovery of a Model Amy pic, somewhere.
http://www.megamillions.com/numbers/
I’m not sure what you did in post processing… but it is a very effective combination of an aged/distressed look and lighting. Very contemporary look.
Your room is a great location! Of course… you are very beautiful too. I used to take self portraits when i was much younger, but no longer!
… and when your childhood room no longer exists… you have this.
Nice, Tony! Did ‘ya win?
http://www.amydunn.com/blog/mega-millions/
Barbara, thank you. I added a lot of grungy texture as an overlay to the image and merged two photos together: one of me looking into the window and one of me sitting on the bed. I can now look at this photo and not get creeped out by it. Now that the spooky factor is over (my mom chopped down the tree in the backyard that soaked up all the light last week), so now I get an introspective feel on the image overall.
My brother nailed it on a comment he made about this photo, on Facebook:
“Awe, you’re holding Ernie. That just reminds me of our childhood and the adversity we had to overcome.”
Aw, thanks Amy but sadly no.
Irony is I usually check my numbers on the state (NY or NJ) sites, but for what ever reason I went to the multi state game site and spied that pick (a version of it) of you fanning the paper money.
So it was a luky find.
I laughed when I saw it. I decided to play MegaMillions that week, but I guess I wasn’t as lucky with the lotto as I was with the person that picked my photo. LOL
Amy don’t yourself up. This photo is beautiful.
PS come back to NYC
dont BEAT yourself up. yes i’m retarded sometimes.
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